!$%&@*!

This is just about the only way I can express my c25k attempt today. After yesterdays emotional whatever-you-want-to-call-it, I really wanted to get out there and show myself that today was going to be a different day…

Oh how wrong I was.

A little background story: I live in what could be considered a white trash area. I admit my little home town of Tacoma WA is pretty much all about WWF wrestling, Monster Trucks, Bud light and a good ole romp though the mud in our 4 x 4 jacked up Ford Trucks. With all this white trash goodness I call home I also find myself surrounded by dogs of all shapes and sizes. None of which actually seem to live inside the houses of which they inhabit.

I like to take my dogs out early in the morning to do my c25k. Over the past few weeks I’ve managed to lay down a route that is pretty much dogless to keep my mutts from barking and stopping at every opportunity. Today about 1/2 way through my program (week one, day three first attempt for the second week) I come across a dog that decided to take an early morning stride away from his luxurious doghouse on the front porch of some rundown palm harbor home. I diverted from my normal path…

WRONG IDEA.

Dog after dog came out to greet us. It seemed that no matter where I turned there were 4 legged beasts coming out from everywhere. This does not make for easy management of 2 large leashed dogs that are tethered together (a least that splits off into two leashes). They pull, they jump, they bark and then move along wondering why my patience is growing thin.

When I finally did get us back to our normal route and ready to resume my c25k program (3 intervals in, 5 to go), my ipod shuffle ran out of juice.

@#%$!

@$#%!

and double @#!%$

I still have to walk home so at least I got some exercise. Music-less I walk home feeling defeated. I probably could have just run and walked intermittently but at some point you just have to let go and try to move on to the next thing.

Tomorrow will be my last week one run. I’ll take Saturday off and then begin week two of the c25k on Sunday. The first week of the program I ran everyday for two weeks to build stamina. Week two I will go down to 3 days a week. I’ll need to fill the other days with some sort cardio. I’ll probably just get on the treadmill and walk or box my way through some wii sports. Tax time will find me finally purchasing a wii fit (fingers crossed) and filling my off days with hula hooping, yoga and whatever else comes on that damn thing.

The picture says it all…

This is what I looked like during my couch to 5k run / walk this morning. I’m not sure what happen but it went down something like this:

I got up this morning at 7am ( a little cranky from watching the season premier of LOST) and promptly got on the computer. The excuse I used this morning was that my sweats and favorite hoodie needed to go through the dryer before I could do any sort of workout. That gave me at least 40 minutes of facebook time. The second I got on the computer I could feel the wheels turning on how to talk myself out of doing the day’s c25k.

The dryer went off 40 minutes later and there I am still in the chair.

An hour after I get up (and 20 minutes after the dryer let me know it was time) I’ve finally gotten dressed and decided to do my run/walk on the treadmill because of the rain. 5 minute warm up goes well. First 60 / 90 interval goes well. Second interval goes fine but then I started to get hella emotional. My legs hurt, I’m sweating, and I just want to be back in bed. I’m mad at myself for weighing 249 lbs and finding it hard to accept that a 60 second jog is difficult task for me.

Interval 3 and 4 I cry like a baby ( trying to be quiet because my husband is still sleeping ). Interval 5 I get back to business. I’m still emotional but now I just want to prove to myself I can do this. I may be 249 pounds today but today is just 24 hours.

Dinner tonight is a foot long black forest ham from subway. I love subway and will enjoy every bite.

Snooze button x 3 Part II

Okay so where was I…Oh yes, so I got up and did that damn c25k walk/run this morning. Today’s program felt better than yesterday. I actually felt like I was running. My strides were longer and less awkward. Not every cycle mind you but I had at least three cycles that felt really good.

What I didn’t do today was get on the computer and check my facebook for an hour which would be typical for me. Instead I jumped in the shower and left my house promptly at 9am. I didn’t have to be to work until 11 and with a 30 minute commute it put me in vicinity of the office at around 930. This gave me an additional 90 minutes to walk around the University campus close by. If I hadn’t taken the extra time to go for a walk I would have missed out on some beautiful nature I didn’t even know was near by…

Snooze button x 3

On certain days of the week I get home kind of late. Usually 11:30ish. Two months ago I would be giddy with anticipation because my husband would be in bed and I could have free reign of the computer to play World of Warcraft until the wee hours of the morning. Checking my inventory, flying around Northrend killing things and just plain old doing nothing in the middle of the night.

This habit is no longer an option for me. For one thing I’ve given up playing WoW as of January 6th…it’s funny how you don’t think an online game really can take over your life but it does and it did mine. Now when I get home at 1130p, I get right to bed and read for about 10 minutes and then fall off into la la land.

Another change I’ve made in this life changing journey is get up at 7am every morning. The first month I got up at 7 am to get on the treadmill first thing. Now I’m up at 7am to be out of the house by 7:30 to do the c25k.

There is a point to this story.

The point being is that I didn’t want to get up today.

I was tired and wanted to keep sleeping. I hit the snooze the first time and crawled back into bed. I slept an additional 9 minutes before the alarm went off again. I hit the snooze button for a second time and crawled back into bed. That’s when the conversation started between my lazy self and my “new lifestyle journey” self…it went something like this:

LS: “Just stay in bed, you don’t need to go out today”

NLJS: “You will get out of bed because you need this”

LS: “pssssssh, you don’t really need this. You can do this tomorrow”

NLJS: “Listen here LS, there’s a new kid in town and I’m taking over this playground. Now get up and get out there cause dammit you’re almost ready to move onto c25k week two”

LS: “@!%& YOU!”

At 7:18 I hit that damn snooze button. I did not crawl back into bed. I got dressed and took my NLJS out the door and did week one day 2 (repeated cycle two) of c25k..

Hold that thought. Lunch time and I need to go for my walk.

Calorie intake for Feb 1st 2010

I am on a 1580 / day calorie intake. Some days I come in way under and some days I just eek by. I’ve only gone over a significant amount a few times since starting this life change.

Today I will end the day with 1494/1580. My meals today included a ziploc baggy full of veggies (carrots, grape tomatoes, grapes, mushrooms and red/yellow peppers), a footlong Black Forest Ham from subway (with baked lays). I snacked on a few mixed nuts, a delicious pear, banana and a nature valley peanut butter granola bar.

I ended the day with a nice hot cup of tea.

Well Hello there Monday…

I woke up bright and early this morning (30 minutes before the alarm) and laid in bed thinking about running my c25k. I took Saturday off and then started the first week again on Sunday. It’s funny how a little change can really impact your thought processes. 2 months ago the first thing I would have thought about was playing World of Warcraft. Now I’m thinking about what the weather is going to be when I get outside. Instead of thinking “I have an hour free, I should run home and play on the computer“, I’m thinking “I have an hour free, I should go for a walk“.

This will be my last week on c25k week one. I’m a little apprehensive about going on to week 2 as I’m still struggling to get to the 60 second mark without slowing down. I have noticed though that my brain is slowly but surely not focusing in on the time but rather picking a spot in the distance to watch. There have even been a few times that I felt like 60 seconds was easy peasy. The main difference I’ve noticed is that I think I could keep going even after the 5 minute walk warm up 8 reps of 60 seconds jogging and 90 seconds walking and then the last 5 minutes cool down…I’m starting to feel like “that’s it?” I think about sneaking in another round but feel it’s better to just follow straight on through (albeit my decision to repeat each week twice).

Tonight’s dinner is a foot long Black Forest Ham Subway sandwich. I’ve been looking forward to this all day!

February 1st, 2010 248.2

This is pretty freaking cool!

I know this guy. Not in real life. I know him virtually. His name is Tyler. Last year (January 2009) he looked at himself in the mirror one day and didn’t like what he saw. At 344 pounds he made a commitment to himself to lose weight. A year later (Jan 2010) he’s lost 125 so far and working hard to get down below 200. He’s got a blog called 344 pounds and has some amazing stories to share.

I followed his journey for a little while (4 months so far) and about 5 weeks ago decided that I too didn’t like the way I looked any longer. I’ve always been a big girl and hid the weight well. Turning 40 was a big wake up call for me. Pretty soon all the things I want to try (or contemplating trying) will be out of my reach if I don’t make some drastic changes in my physical well being. That being said, I too am now on a life style changing journey.

To say diet is to lie to myself. I am not on a diet. I am on a life changing mission. Eat less, move more! Period. Nothing more, nothing less. The last month has been a challenge in more ways than one but here I am at week number 5 and the picture up there is proof that something is working.

On December 29th I weighed 263 lbs.

Today I don’t.

December 29th I played World of Warcraft for hours at a time.

Today I’m repeating the first week of couch to 5k.

December 29th I was taking the elevator whenever possible .

Today I take the stairs.

December 29th I parked as close to whatever building I need to enter.

Today I park as far away as possible.

December 29th I was just a fat girl.

Today I’m a fat girl with a purpose!