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The Secret

www.nataliedee.com

When people find out that I’ve lost 120 pounds I get asked the same question almost each time:

What is your Secret?

At first I would laugh and say something funny like “magical unicorns” but over time it started to get a little annoying…

Want to really know the Secret?

Secret Number one: Stop stuffing your face with shitty food. You see me make good choices (or at least the best choice I can make at that particular instance) and you laugh that you wish you could do the same while you ask for extra gravy for your potatoes or instead of getting vegetable as a side you ask for a potato with “all the fixins”. Stop telling me it’s hard for you to make better choices. Stop telling me that “healthy” food doesn’t taste as good. Your brain is wired to want grease, salt, or sweet calorie laden food. It wasn’t easy for me to change the way I eat. My secret? I retrained my mind to understand that fast food restaurants don’t give a rat’s ass about me or my health. Over time instead of craving the foods that packed on the fat onto my body, I began to crave the food that shed the fat and made me feel strong, healthy and full of energy in both mind and body.

Secret Number two: Break a sweat and do it often. You see me today a much smaller version of who I used to be. You see me strap on my running shoes, boxing gloves or work out so hard I feel it in my lungs hours later. But it’s not what I used to be able to do. You give me all the excuses in the world about how you can’t do what I do so you’ll never be able to lose as much weight as I could. When I first started breaking a sweat I did it by walking my dogs. I walked them for 15 minutes, then for 30 minutes until I was walking 2 to 3 miles each morning. I took the stairs instead of the elevator and parked farther away from any entrance I was trying to reach. When I decided to run it happened slow…60 seconds, 3 minutes, 8 minutes: half a block, 6 blocks, 1 mile until my first 5k. One pushup with my knees on the floor and arms shaking became one normal pushup with my arms barely bending to my first full pushup to finally being able to multiple pushups without even thinking…

Stop telling me you don’t have the time and energy or the stamina to exercise. You are making excuses. I made them too for so long and at 270 pounds I had to stop telling myself I can’t and start telling myself  “do whatever you fucking can and move”. Don’t tell me you wish you could go to the gym or afford a trainer. YOU ARE MAKING EXCUSES. Can’t afford to go to the gym? Make weights at home (milk gallon jugs filled with water make a great start). Can’t afford to take a class or go to yoga, rent videos from your local library. Walk everywhere. Park farther away. Find a building with multiple floors and climb the stairs. DO SOMETHING…ANYTHING.

Secret Number three: Make yourself a priority. Don’t tell me you can’t because of work, kids, and or husband/wife. You are using them as an excuse to not do what is necessary. That’s mean. Don’t blame them. Don’t use them as a reason to sit around and do nothing but watch your life be defined by the size of your pants or by how many X’s are on your shirt label. Do they take up a lot of your time? Take it back. I worked an average of 65 hours a week and had a household to run. Did I let it stop me? No. I got up before the sun came up and moved until I was sweating. I was exhausted by the end of the day but over time I got used to it. I cried most mornings when my alarm went off at 330a so that I could be out the door by 430a. I constantly battled with my fat self to get out of bed and take control. It fucking sucked…until it didn’t. Now I look forward to that time in the morning that is set aside just for me. First thing I do is take care of me, the rest of the day is spent taking care of everything else. My body used to hate me for working out so much. Now it hates me when I don’t…

Secret Number four: Don’t ever give up. There will be days (maybe even weeks) where you feel like this is all worthless, that you will never get to where you want to be. Let me be very clear when I say this: THAT IS YOUR OLD FAT SELF TALKING. We are wired to be self sabotaging. We are wired to think we’re going to fail. We are wired to believe we don’t deserve to get out there and find the life we so desperately want, need and deserve to have. I can’t tell you how many times I looked in the mirror and said “I hate you Tara, you will fail like every other time” only to force myself to stop, kiss the mirror and say “No not today Tara. You are not giving up today”. I can’t begin to tell you how hard it was is for me some days to let the negative voices play out and not give in. I can’t begin to tell you how hard it is to brush myself off after I feel like I’ve moved in the wrong direction. Confession: I’ve been on this journey for 18 months and you’d think I’d have it down but in fact I don’t. Just last week I purged after letting the voices in my head win. But did I lay down and let life control me? Did I say “well what’s the point?” No. I forgave myself and moved forward. I refuse to go back to that life. I refuse to allow my old way of thinking control my new way of living…

Here’s the most important secret:

Secret Number five: There is no secret. No magic pill. No magic liquid. No magic nothing. There is only sweat. Only commitment. Only change. Only desire. Only the will to do whatever it takes no matter what. You want this bad enough, you will go out there and get it. You will end the excuses. You will make the changes…

Ask yourself

Do you want it bad enough?

I do.

Whatever it takes.

I do.

 

 

June 21st, 2011 | Category: Uncategorized

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