And Cut….

And just like that the immigration process is over.

18 long months we’ve been shuffling papers, paying fees and waiting….

And waiting….

And waiting…

Over a year of running to the mailbox hoping for some silver lining and only finding letters of such and such has expired or “we never received payment” when clearly our bank account says they did. Offices closing and files left sitting until someone stamps the next phase as complete but never truly explains just how many phases there are to finish.

Getting the “we made a decision” email and then nothing. Asking for a copy of my passport and then silence. Being told it would be another 35 days once the decision has been made to get something in the mail but that thing is what? Welcome to Canada or Go Back to the States? and 35 days? Is that business days or actual days because you know 4 ish weeks is much shorter than 7 weeks but really whats another 2 months added on to the 18 months we’ve already been waiting…

Wednesday.

The anticipated “it won’t be here” walk to the mailbox.

And there it was.

Almost like Charlie and the golden ticket, the envelope from CIC had arrived but too afraid to be disappointed, we didn’t assume that “golden ticket” was inside. Heart racing, tears already falling and the ever so painfully slow opening of the envelope so as not to rip any paper work inside.

We had gotten so used to the waiting we didn’t even know how to react to what amounts to everything about our lives changing once again. The celebrational jump around the kitchen complete, we planned our “holy shit, we have to get to a border as fast as possible” road trip. Throwing some extra food in the bowl for the cats, a quick call to my in-laws and all of a sudden we’re driving towards the US border, not knowing what we were doing but at least we had the piece of paper that said come on down, we’d be happy to make you a permanent resident of Canada.

350 miles and six hours later, I stood in front of a immigration officer and watched him sign his John Hancock to the one piece of paper that is about as important to me as my beautiful wife Mimi, my gorgeous niece Amy, my Old man Chester cat and the one thing that I truly own outright: My Car Dusty.

Fast forward to today (not quite a week later) and I’m feeling the affects of all the crossroads converging. My mind has been going a mile a minute about what to do. My eating in celebration of paperwork, unplanned road trips and Easter holiday has been literally in the crapper (causing my crapper to not function properly) and I’m literally at a stand still as to “What’s Next?” Throw in a little (or a lot of) back pain from throwing it out Wednesday followed by 12 hours of driving but not giving a shit because I had a piece of paper that needed someone’s Johnny H and I’ll be damn if it wasn’t happening ASAP means I haven’t broken a sweat in just about a week and thoughts of Half Iron Man training went on the back burner while Pizza, Beer, Ice Cream, Coconut Cream Pie, Cadbury Mini Eggs and Potato Chips were front and center.

I’m combing job postings like a mother fucker. Thinking about returning to the work force and finally….finally being able to contribute financially to this marriage and bring some peace to Mimi’s over worked bank account. A flower shop just opened up last week less than a block from our house and I stare at it’s windows anticipating the day I can walk in and buy something without having to first ask Mimi for a few bucks.

I’m thinking about what I actually want to do for employment. Go back to my career as an interpreter? Something that I was exceptionally good at back home but not sure where I fit in here, the universe sent me a sign (pun intended) this weekend during our garage sale festivities. Three Deaf people approached our table (among 400+ tables) and for over a half hour we chatted away reminding me why I love being an interpreter. It felt so natural to be back in my “element”. At the same time my life since arriving in Halifax has taken some much ingrained turns. Working full time will change everything. Christ, working part time will change everything. Thoughts of “who will cook and clean?” “Who will run the blogs?” “Who will lay around with Chester when he’s not feeling so hot in his old age?”, “What happens to the coaching that I love so much?”…”How does all of this affect my Half Iron Man?”

There is so much racing through my mind that I am standing in the middle of the proverbial room and not knowing which way to turn to get up and get moving. This blog post is more about helping me verbally vomit all the stuff inside my head so that I can get down to business of finding a job and finding a new balance in my marriage to Red. My to-do list is long with little things that bring me joy (making almond butter) and big things that scare the crap out of me (research business license for freelancing). Today is the last day of vacation for Red and not wanting to waste it sitting in front of the laptop trying to decide whether I want to be a part time dishwasher, a full time beer drive thru attendant or an interpreter, I also don’t want another second to go by without hitting the send button with the subject “Job posting”.

Food is another matter in this “help, someone tell me what to do next” panic feeling. The both of us are feeling the affect of “fuck it, let’s eat (insert food here)“. So we begin to reign in our choices this week and try to return to a more “normal” food foundation knowing it’s what makes us feel better physically and emotionally.

Now I’m off to drink copious amounts of coffee (with coconut milk) and begin figuring out how to tackle this new chapter in my life and  planning what kind of flowers I’m going to be buying my beautiful Red with my very first Canadian paycheck!

Welcome to Canada!

11 comments to And Cut….

  • Today it’s been two years since we met in person for the first time in Vancouver. And today it feels like it’s been two seconds and two eternities at the same time. I had this guy feeling that the “golden ticket” paper work would show up while I was off on vacation and we could open that long-awaited envelope together. I’m so grateful my instincts were right. And I’m even more grateful that the time off meant we didn’t have to wait a second to head for the border and complete the rest of the process once it was finally within our power to do so.

    Canada may not realize yet how lucky it is but I do.

    Today we will remind ourselves to slow down.
    Remember that whatever the next steps are, we take them one at a time together. Remind ourselves to celebrate what we’ve been waiting for for so long.
    Remember that no matter how much life may change in the days to come we’re so damn luck to have each other.

    #lawn

  • JUST BREATHE…

    all the rest will come, as did your papers, in good time!

  • Congrats!!!!! to you both. So wonderful.

  • WOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!! Super excited for you! Congratulations!!!!! 🙂

  • Conny Mc

    Only one word needed ~LOVE~~

  • SO excited for you both!

    I second Jules’ advice…breathe in, breathe out, repeat. Set your intention, take some action (which you’ve already done) and the universe will provide. I’ll share one of my all-time favorite quotes:

    Until one is committed, there is always hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness.

    Concerning acts of initiative (and creation) there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans:

    That the moment one definitely commits oneself then providence moves, too.

    All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no person could have dreamt would come his way.

    Whatever you can do, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now.

  • I was so incredibly happy to see these posts on Facebook last week…….

    I agree with the previous poster(s). Breathe, chill, repeat.

    Now go kick some @ss!

    …and more importantly, WELCOME TO CANADA,eh?

  • I cannot put into words how EXCITED I am for you. It’s okay (good, even!) that you took the time to celebrate, maybe more than you wanted, and just be freaked out in a good way and emo and all eat-drink-repeat. Now slow down, take a deep breath, and enjoy the opportunity to really BE and LIVE where you are since now you have the right paperwork. Even though you (and we) knew you belonged there long before you got Canada’s “official” stamp of approval. Love you both!

  • I’m so stinkin’ happy for you I can hardly stand it! Hopefully things are settling down a little for you now, but don’t ever let go of that feeling of sheer and utter HAPPY!!!

  • Ryubixgirl

    Woww… I like how Å·ou write, just like you are thinking! And Congo for the job and change… I might be looking at some change by the end of this year…. Hope everything works out here too…

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